Once a woman asked Osho: “I Love my husband but I hate Sex, and that creates conflict. Isn’t sex Animalistic?”
I have known so many women (and so few men) like that that it’s not funny. Not only in India,Worldwide. Mankind is raising such retarded children.
Osho said: You say I Love my husband but I hate Sex, and that creates conflict. How can you love your husband and yet hate sex’? You must be playing on words. How can you love your husband and hate sex? Just try to understand it. When you love a man, you would like to hold his hand too. When you love a man, you would like to hug him sometimes too. When you love a man, you would not only like to hear his sound, you would like to see his face too. When you only hear the sound of your beloved, the beloved is far away, the sound is not enough; when you see him too you are more satisfied.
When you touch him, certainly you are even more satisfied. When you taste him, certainly you are even more satisfied. What is sex? It is just a meeting of . . . two deep energies. You must be carrying some taboos in your mind, inhibitions. What is sex’? Just two persons meeting at the maximum point — not only holding hands, not only hugging each other’s bodies, but penetrating into each other’s energy realm. Why should you hate sex?
Your mind must have been conditioned by the Mahatmas, the so-called ‘religious’ people who have poisoned the whole of humanity, who have poisoned your very source of growth. Why should you hate? If you love your man, you would like to share your total being with him: there is no need to hate. And if you hate sex, what are you saying’? You are simply saying that you want the man to take care of you financially, to take care of the house, to bring you a car and a fur coat. You want to use the man… and you call it love’? And you don’t want to share anything with him.
When you love, you share all. When you love, you don’t have any secrets. When you love, you have your heart utterly open; you are available. When you love, you are ready to go with him even to hell if he is going to hell. But this happens. We are very expert with words: we don’t want to say that we don’t love, so we make it look as if we love and we hate sex. Sex is not all love — that’s true, love is more than sex — that’s true; but sex is the very foundation of it. Yes, one day sex disappears, but to hate it is not the way to make it disappear.
To hate it is the way to repress it. And whatsoever is repressed will come up one way or other. Please don’t try to become a monk or a nun. Remember, sex is natural. One can go beyond it, but not though repression. And if you repress it, sooner or later you will find some other way to express it; some perversion is bound to enter — you will have to find some substitute. And substitutes are of NO help at all; they DON’T help, they CAN’T help.
And once a natural problem has been turned in such a way that you have forgotten about it, and it has bubbled up somewhere else as a substitute, you can go on fighting with the substitute, but it is not going to help substitutes never help; they only create perversions. obsessions. Be natural if you want to go beyond nature some day. Be natural: that is the first requirement. I am not saying that there is nothing more than nature, there is a higher nature — that is the whole message of Tantra. But be very earthly if you really want to rise high in the sky.
Can’t you see these trees? They are rooted in the earth, and the better they are rooted the higher they go. The higher they want to go, the deeper they will have to go into the earth. If a tree wants to touch the stars, the tree will have to go and touch the very hell — that’s the only way. Be rooted in your body if you want to become a soul. Be rooted in your sex if you really want to become a lover. Yes, the more energy is converted into love, the less and less need of sex will be there, but you will not hate it.
Hate is not a right relationship with anything. Hate simply shows that you are afraid. Hate simply shows that there is great fear in you. Hate simply shows that deep down you are still attracted. If you hate sex, then your energy will start moving somewhere else. Energy has to move. If God gives you sexual energy, it becomes sacred. Anything from God is sacred and everything is from God. And by “God” I don’t mean a certain person, I mean the whole existence.